Changes
Posted 05-31-2008 at 01:52 PM by Fallguy
Well there are going to be SEVERAL changes coming down the road for me and some those may/will cause others. As most of you know I live next to my mother and the house I live in is actually owned by her and we sort of have a bartered rent system for me. Well they are building a pizza place on the lot that faces the highway of which the road we live in comes off of, this lot is behind mom’s house and to the side of my back yard (my back yard goes further back than mom's). Mom has talked about selling her house at times even more lately because of problems with it. Well…as she got back from her walk Monday morning the guy who owns the pizza place lot pulled in her driveway…yep, you guessed it, he wants to buy her place. As it turns out he wants to buy the place I’m on as well. To be honest I’ve not been happy with this location for a while myself. So overall this is probably a good thing, but it does bring up so many other things.
Let me just sort of make a list of the things that are crossing my mind….
Mom is actually planning on moving to TX within a year or so it seems (that is a WHOLE nother situation I’m still not ready to talk about), so the move out of her house will be to just sort of to a “holding place”. However as most know my daughter and her BF are staying with my mother….so not sure what they are going to do, they may try and find a place, they have talked about a place with my mother that they can keep themselves when she moves…so who knows. Of course he is going to have to get some sort of steady/real job to be able to do that. I told Kim yesterday that her and the baby could come back with me, wherever I end up, if she needed to, but the BF couldn’t. Didn’t look like that went over too well. Might be different if he was productive instead of drain.
I have been so used to having my mom next door as a backup for the boys while I was at work. Although there really wasn’t a lot of interaction, she was always there “just in case” well that will not be the case now. Do I need to get a different job? Do they need to go back with their mother? After not paying me any child support for 5+ years, would she want child support from me? Would the court order it even if she said she didn’t want it? Would that be the best for the boys?
Where can I move to? As it is now I barely pay my bills and that is with no money payment for rent…so not sure how I could take up a rent/house payment under my current one income household situation. But, I have thought about moving closer to work, but there are some changes coming at work that could affect my decision/ability to stay there…so do I want to move close to there, then not work there? Right now I don’t have the details of the changes, I really need those before I can know more. But also, while I make ok pay at work, it really hasn’t kept up with things over the last few years, and with overtime being cut out I have actually grossed about 20% less the last few years than the years where I could work overtime. So do I want to stay there anyway? But I doubt I could walk in the door anywhere else around here and make what I do know…so a move to a new place and making less money….that dang sure doesn’t sound good. This could be the “kick in the pants” (opportunity) I need to make a major move. Instead of 1 mile or 10…maybe 100 or even 1000. I hate to say it, but it's not like I'd be leaving any close friends here. I mean I like the guys at work, but for various reasons we don't really interact with each other away from work.
My sons are split…one would like to move out of the area and start fresh, the other wants to stay in the same county we are in now. My brother in NC, well his wife, tells me about places for sale around her sometimes. A cousin in CO tells me about places and job opportunities close to her. My uncle from TX that passed away has a very influential friend in Houston and could probably help get me started there or maybe elsewhere in TX…not sure I want to move from a city with a population of 2500 to the 4th largest city in the country…lol….or do I? If was to go to TX, close to mom or not?…hate say this, but probably not. Of course there are other places too. When I was first divorced I had thought about Hot Springs, AR. That is where I was born and we used to go back there a lot when I was young to see my grandfather…I like the area.
Oh….and Kim’s college and work decisions she is trying to make as well with all of this.
….and this doesn’t even include the actually logistics of moving two different households to two different places. My mother has been in that house for over 35 years and I in this one for 16-17, so lots of stuff to go through, throw away or pack.
Of course you know I tend to over think things anyway…and that is the minor stuff, now that my mind has some real issues to gnaw on, it’s just about to go into overdrive….just hope it doesn’t burn out.
Well……if you don’t hear from me for a little…this is why….just trying to sort things out…not sure how quick or not these things are coming, but…they are coming. It’s not change that scares me as much (although it does a little to be honest) but so much unknown and unsure about the future that is sort of getting to me.
Take care…and thanks for making it through the long blog…
Let me just sort of make a list of the things that are crossing my mind….
Mom is actually planning on moving to TX within a year or so it seems (that is a WHOLE nother situation I’m still not ready to talk about), so the move out of her house will be to just sort of to a “holding place”. However as most know my daughter and her BF are staying with my mother….so not sure what they are going to do, they may try and find a place, they have talked about a place with my mother that they can keep themselves when she moves…so who knows. Of course he is going to have to get some sort of steady/real job to be able to do that. I told Kim yesterday that her and the baby could come back with me, wherever I end up, if she needed to, but the BF couldn’t. Didn’t look like that went over too well. Might be different if he was productive instead of drain.
I have been so used to having my mom next door as a backup for the boys while I was at work. Although there really wasn’t a lot of interaction, she was always there “just in case” well that will not be the case now. Do I need to get a different job? Do they need to go back with their mother? After not paying me any child support for 5+ years, would she want child support from me? Would the court order it even if she said she didn’t want it? Would that be the best for the boys?
Where can I move to? As it is now I barely pay my bills and that is with no money payment for rent…so not sure how I could take up a rent/house payment under my current one income household situation. But, I have thought about moving closer to work, but there are some changes coming at work that could affect my decision/ability to stay there…so do I want to move close to there, then not work there? Right now I don’t have the details of the changes, I really need those before I can know more. But also, while I make ok pay at work, it really hasn’t kept up with things over the last few years, and with overtime being cut out I have actually grossed about 20% less the last few years than the years where I could work overtime. So do I want to stay there anyway? But I doubt I could walk in the door anywhere else around here and make what I do know…so a move to a new place and making less money….that dang sure doesn’t sound good. This could be the “kick in the pants” (opportunity) I need to make a major move. Instead of 1 mile or 10…maybe 100 or even 1000. I hate to say it, but it's not like I'd be leaving any close friends here. I mean I like the guys at work, but for various reasons we don't really interact with each other away from work.
My sons are split…one would like to move out of the area and start fresh, the other wants to stay in the same county we are in now. My brother in NC, well his wife, tells me about places for sale around her sometimes. A cousin in CO tells me about places and job opportunities close to her. My uncle from TX that passed away has a very influential friend in Houston and could probably help get me started there or maybe elsewhere in TX…not sure I want to move from a city with a population of 2500 to the 4th largest city in the country…lol….or do I? If was to go to TX, close to mom or not?…hate say this, but probably not. Of course there are other places too. When I was first divorced I had thought about Hot Springs, AR. That is where I was born and we used to go back there a lot when I was young to see my grandfather…I like the area.
Oh….and Kim’s college and work decisions she is trying to make as well with all of this.
….and this doesn’t even include the actually logistics of moving two different households to two different places. My mother has been in that house for over 35 years and I in this one for 16-17, so lots of stuff to go through, throw away or pack.
Of course you know I tend to over think things anyway…and that is the minor stuff, now that my mind has some real issues to gnaw on, it’s just about to go into overdrive….just hope it doesn’t burn out.
Well……if you don’t hear from me for a little…this is why….just trying to sort things out…not sure how quick or not these things are coming, but…they are coming. It’s not change that scares me as much (although it does a little to be honest) but so much unknown and unsure about the future that is sort of getting to me.
Take care…and thanks for making it through the long blog…
Total Comments 5
Comments
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You definitely have a lot of options to consider right now. It's definitely true that when life closes one door, it tends to open another. In your case it's opened a few, so you have to decide which one to step through.
Moving to another state can be exciting and terrifying at the same time. I sort of jumped before I looked when I moved to Tennessee about 10 years ago. It has been the best move I ever made.
Texas is one of those states that I've had on my list of places I wouldn't mind moving to. If you decide to go that route, you will have the option of starting over completely. New home, new job, new friends... total reset.
That's kind of a neat option to play with in your mind, no doubt.Posted 06-02-2008 at 03:01 PM by TGO David
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Good luck with what ever decisions that you make! I hope everything works out perfectly for you.Posted 06-19-2008 at 09:20 AM by Natosha
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tungsten is right imho...when I was younger. I maded my living as a bricklayer. one day I looked around and didn't like the company I was in...so I changed everything. it was for. the better!Posted 06-30-2008 at 10:51 AM by towerclimber37
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God Bless and God Speed.Posted 07-16-2008 at 09:10 AM by skipsfirearms
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Good luck to you in whatever you do. I would hate to lose you to TX (all my exes live in Texas, literally). I do have aunts, uncles, cousins in San Antonio, but I lived on the gulf coast for five years and like TN better.
Another poster was so right - one door closes, another opens.
Again, good luck as you sort thru this new hand fate is dealing you.
BarryPosted 06-04-2009 at 11:14 PM by 3pugguy
