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Building an ark


Djay3

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Build an ark the Lord said to Noah, "In six months I'm going to make it rain until the earth is covered with water and all the evil is destroyed. I want you to build an ark and save two of each animal species. Here are the blue prints for the ark."

... six months passed ... The skys began to cloud and rain began to fall. Noah sat in his front yard weeping.

"Why haven't you built the ark?", asked the Lord.

"Oh forgive me", said Noah, "I tried but so many things have happened. The blue prints you gave me didn't meet the city's code and I had to change them. Then the city said I was violating the zoning ordnance by building the ark in my front yard so I had to get a variance. The Forest Service required tree cutting permits, and I was sued by an animal rights group when I tried to gather up the animals. The EPA required an environmental impact statement concerning the flood. The Army Corps of Engineers wanted a map of the proposed flood plain. The IRS seized all my assets, claiming I was trying to avoid paying taxes by fleeing the country, and the Equal Opportunity Commision said I wasn't hiring enough Croations. So, I'm sorry Lord but I can't finish the ark for at least five years!"

Suddenly the rain stopped, the skys cleared and the sun began to shine. Noah looked up and said, "Lord does this mean you are not going to devastate the earth?"

"Right", said the Lord,"the government already has."

 

 

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