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Wife help.......


Guest Baddawg865

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Guest Baddawg865

I need some help on getting my wife interested in shooting with me. I mean she checks out all my guns and says " There Pretty " but i want her to want to go to the range. Does any of your women act this way? I told her i bought the XD9sc for her.....which wasn't a total lie.

So any advise besides finding a new wife.....I'd kinda like to hold on to this one for now!

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It really depends on your wife and what her apprehension is about going and shooting.

My wife took awhile to warm up to it. She was fine with guns, but didn't want to shoot or carry. Once I got my permit process started and we began discussing things like crime more often she opened up enough to where I finally bargained her into going shooting with me. Now she has a permit and carries the exact gun you mentioned.

I suggest asking her to go with you and make an evening/day date out of it. Take her to lunch or dinner and to the range. Tell her you would feel better if she at least knew how to operate it safely and that you would also like her, as your wife, to be part of your hobby that you enjoy so much.

Hope that helps some. Another thing would be to see if you can get her to take a safety class. There are several vendors here who offer top notch training and I'm sure there is one close to you that could help!

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My wife had no interest in guns because she has a 6'4" 290 lbs husband to protect her. But as I age I'm not as physically capable to protect her as I once was, and I point that out to her. I had to get her to realize how dangerous our world was as well, so I emailed her links to 911 calls of women getting raped and murdered while on the phone as well as ones that had the woman shooting the intruder. I also emailed her links to local news whenever there was a home invasion, assault, rape, or murder nearby. These things changed her mindset quite a bit. She still looks to me for protection while I'm around, but she now is looking to herself for when I'm either not around or incapacitated. We bought her a 642 with Crimson Trace grips last Saturday, she's anxious to go shoot it next Saturday, (the soonest that we can), she wants to practice with it to become proficient, and she's going to get her HCP.

Also, if you get her to the range make sure she wears a high-cut shirt rather than a V-neck. My wife wasn't happy about it when a hot case bounced off the range partition and down her cleavage resulting in burned boobs.

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Guest mustangdave

My wife got interested in guns after going to a dog show in Olive Branch, Miss and hearing about folks there having their RV's broke into while on site at the dog show...she said that since i could not be with her at EVERY dog show she thought it would be a good idea to take a class and learn how to handle a handgun...thus started our joint trip to HCP-dom...she took Buford's class and SHE bought a Ruger SP 101 snubby..notdesiring to be "out gunned" I purchased a Taurus Tracker 357 Magnum...and we started going to the range fairly regular...now the Armory includes those 2 handguns...plus...a Bennelli Nova Tactical 12 guage, Ruger Mini 14, Henry Lever Action 22Mag, FNP-40, Bersa 380CC, Kel-Tec P3-AT, Ruger MK III 22 pistol(OLD)...and her trusty Red Ryder BB gun...and plenty of ammo.

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Guest musiccitymadman

I would have to agree that maybe a group outing with other women shooters there might make her feel more comfortable and less intemidated about shooting. And remember how you coach or otherwise give instruction or advice has to be done in a way that is incourgaging and fun. And not come across as being controling or critizing. If she is like my ex wife after her first trip she will want to shoot every weekend.

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Mine is still a work in progress. I'll wear her down tho. I have gotten her shooting the .22 off the front porch and it's only a matter of time before she caves. hearing more of the stories about being mugged, assulted, raped, etc just feeds it. She's already calling some of them cute.. LOL

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Guest Baddawg865

I have thought about letting her listen to the 911 tapings as well. There are some that i have heard that make you start thinking. I might just have to go that route. One of my buddies on here is going to get his wife involved, so the group outings thing might work as well.

And i will make sure she don't burn her puppies!! Those guns have to be taken care of!! :yum:

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I told her i bought the XD9sc for her

That might not have been the best way to start out. Most folks subscribe to the rule that SHE needs to be the ultimate one to choose the weapon. You can offer suggestions but she has to pick it. She has to feel comfortable with what she's shooting. Many women aren't confident with semi's and like revolvers better when they start out. I'd let her know that you can get her a different gun (or borrow one) if that's holding her back. Also, letting her start out with .22's really helps out. They will quickly move to heavier calibers with time. Don't rush it.

I've read some pretty good threads with suggestions over in the Women and Firearms section. While these suggestions might help bring your wife around to firearms, it's still got to be her decision. If she doesn't fully believe in the important of shooting and ultimately a HCP, you'll be pushing a rope.

Good luck with winning your wife over. I had the benefit that I started when mine was still my girlfriend. That's when they'll go with you to do just about anything to spend time with you.

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Guest Baddawg865
That might not have been the best way to start out. Most folks subscribe to the rule that SHE needs to be the ultimate one to choose the weapon. You can offer suggestions but she has to pick it. She has to feel comfortable with what she's shooting. Many women aren't confident with semi's and like revolvers better when they start out. I'd let her know that you can get her a different gun (or borrow one) if that's holding her back. Also, letting her start out with .22's really helps out. They will quickly move to heavier calibers with time. Don't rush it.

Buying another gun that she likes.......well ok, you talked me into it! That will not be a problem. Great idea!

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I second getting her a .22 and a plinker. My wife was totally opposed to guns as recently as a couple of years ago. Then I told her I was bringing my guns back in the house, and I didn't are what she thought of it. I bought a .22 for my son, and took them to the range one day last summer, and on the way back into to town we had to stop and get her her own .22. Now she has a Taurus PT709 Slim and a HCP. Also, just don't give her the option. Tell her she's going to the range with you on Saturday and she's going to learn how to shoot, because her safety depends upon it, and your job as a husband is to always keep her safe.

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Find a local Women On Target class (or similar) and send her to it. If she's the type that needs moral support, talk a few of her friend's husbands into sending their wives too.

My wife wasn't really interested in shooting until we had our son. I guess the idea of having to protect him motivated her. I took her shooting with a .22 pistol one time prior to the class so she'd know how to operate it... turns out she's a pretty good shot too. I intentionally provided minimal instruction, just the basics.

She went into the class quite anxious. She came home after the class and announced that she wanted a .40 subcompact to carry. :tinfoil: We've been shooting several times since and she's since decided that she prefers 9mm. Life's other little expenses have precluded purchasing one yet and her excitement has dwindled a bit, but I think once spring rolls around her interest may pick back up.

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Guest tnvolfan

I really feel bad for some of you guys who are doing everything in the world to encourage your wives in this wonderful sport. Many of you have some excellent ideas, and as a woman, I'd like to comment on a few. The date idea is great, because every wife loves a night out with her hubby. Staying away from the V-neck blouses is also a good warning, because I wear a turtleneck now for the very reasons he mentioned! The classes are also good, because most women feel very incompetent around firearms. In this winter cold, I would suggest an indoor range if you have one in your area. Women hate being cold, so shoot indoors! Check to see if they have a ladies' day, because beginners gain encouragement from seeing other women on the range. Don't give up, she'll come around. I think it's great you guys care enough to want to get her interested. A word of warning though: guns are like pairs of shoes -- you can NEVER have too many!

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Guest Baddawg865

I have finally talked her into going to the range. I actually let her get on the forums and read this post. Thanks for all your help. And it's fine with me if guns are like shoes......You can never have to many!!

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I think Punisher 84 hit it on the head, a date night/afternoon was what worked for me. Now she does not always go with me but at least she is up for it. It also helps that several friends from church want to go with me the next time and their wives have also voiced interest also. Sounds like a group outing is next.

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  • 1 month later...
I think Punisher 84 hit it on the head, a date night/afternoon was what worked for me. Now she does not always go with me but at least she is up for it. It also helps that several friends from church want to go with me the next time and their wives have also voiced interest also. Sounds like a group outing is next.

Way late to this, but I'm glad it worked for you! ;)

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FWIW, been there and done that as well. Wife wasn't all that interested in shooting sports. Took me years, and yes, used the "shoot and supper date" method, along with many others, including trade-offs (such as trip to the range with me, traded for me going shopping with her. Uggg).

Fast forward ... she took my Beretta 21A BUG away from me because it was "so cute." She shot it and liked it. Fast forward again, and she's giving it back, because we searched for a couple of months for "HER" gun (because she wanted "something bigger"). She chose a Taurus 709 Slim ... not my choice, but hers. And now, she's pretty good with it. Wants to go to the range weekly (for HER to shoot). And that's more than okay. Today she told me she wants a wheel gun, too. I'm tickled pink.

Once she shows some interest, my suggestion is that you start her fairly close to the target. Once she becomes proficient (and that's ya'lls call ... doesn't have to be a 1-inch grouping), THEN move her back. Don't make the mistake of starting her at 10 or 15 yards. My missus wanted to shoot from MY starting point, and quickly became discouraged. I had to "gently" nudge her to begin closer to the target, and THEN work on longer distances. Doing well builds confidence, and well, heck, it's just a lot more FUN ... Now, she's back to the 10-yard line. And that's really good for someone who started out a "little afraid" of guns.

Just my ;).

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I guess I am on the other side of the fence. My wife is not into shooting and I will never do anything to try to make it a hobby of hers. Going to the range and guns are my hobbies, she can find her own. I feel no need to have her do everything I like to do the same as I have no desire to participate in most of the stuff she has a hobbies.

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